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Love yourself first

Self love

In my last post I discussed how self-abandonment impacts yourself and your relationships. The antidote to self-abandonment is self-love, something that has become a hot topic amongst Psychologists and Wellbeing bloggers.

I mentioned in my last post that Margaret Paul believed that the majority of failed relationships boiled down to one factor, self-abandonment. This she says comes from a lack of self-love. Self-abandonment happens when we do not respect or acknowledge our own needs and feelings. We abandon ourselves when we are too hard on ourselves, or when we do not speak up for ourselves. However, by practicing self-love and acknowledging our self-worth we can push through our limiting beliefs and live a life that truly thrives.

There are many ways we can practice self-love, here are just a few you can practice.

1, Eat well, fill your body with the healthy nourishment your body deserves.

2, Don´t always believe your inner critic. Be mindful of what you think, feel and want and live your life in ways that truly reflects this.

3, Treat yourself like you treat your best friend or someone you love. Be kinder to yourself.

4, Don´t stay in relationships that don´t reward you. Try to move away from relationships that don´t allow you to be yourself or where the other person does not appreciate your value. If you cannot get away from a toxic relationship then try to practice forgiveness, you may come to accept that it is about their limitations rather than yours and you won´t take it so personally.

5, Take charge of your life and learn when to say no. This is not because you are being mean but because you respect your own needs.

6, Give up the need for approval from others. You can never please everybody all of the time.

7, Be realistic about life. It brings ups and downs and we cannot always be happy. Practice acceptance when you experience the tougher times, because better times are going to come.

8, Try to let go of past difficulties. It is good to review when things go wrong, as this helps you to improve in the future. But try not to dwell on past mistakes or hurt, as this does not help you move forward. Once we have worked out what wasn´t going right then we can practice forgiveness, both for our own past mistakes and for the mistakes of others too. This helps us to move on a try and do better in our future.

9, Do the things that you love. Spend time enjoying the things that make you happy.

10, Practice gratefulness, acknowledge the great things and people you have in your life.

11, Write a diary expressing your thoughts and feelings both positive and negative. Acknowledge where your thoughts are limiting yourself and see where you can improve.

There is a saying that says we can only love others as much as we love ourselves. So if we want to feel abundance in love and maintain healthier relationships then it makes sense that we should start with ourselves, so love you first!

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